Bitter-sweet honey
by didsomeonesayfanfiction
Summary: You're so angry you could scream. You could grab everything on your desk and swipe your claws across the surface smashing everything in their path. But you won't, mainly because your laptop is sitting there, monitor red, containing your life in a nutshell. Human!stuck au set in sollux's perspective. hopefully updated every sunday.
1. Chapter 1

You're so angry you could scream. You could grab everything on your desk and swipe your claws across the surface smashing everything in their path. But you won't, mainly because your laptop is sitting there, monitor red, containing your life in a nutshell. You walk away, still trying to breathe from the sudden adrenaline rush that grabbed your. The window stood just a couple feet away, showing the dusty fall scene outside, the way the sky looked made you uncontrollably shiver from some unknown breeze that must have gotten into your small apartment on the 5th floor.

Your apartment is shabby; you have to try to be honest with yourself. You said that last night whilst in a ball of emotions on the floor caused by- no, you're not thinking about that, you also said that last night. Your kitchen and joint living room was basically equipped when you brought the thing, you moved with only your clothes, toiletries (a toothbrush) and your console and video games, of course your parents wouldn't allow that so you let them do as they please whilst they brought you a fairly comfortable bed to sleep and a medium size 20 inch TV to 'entertain' yourself whilst you're in and away from society, because you know, you're so sociable.

For an earthly second you thought that you were blind, maybe being blind could help you understand more about this godforsaken situation you're stuck in somehow , the darkness could en-wrap you in a friendly warm way and welcome you into its quiet wisdom, but that is not the case this Monday morning. Sunday night stung in the back of your mind as you looked around your cluttered room full of films long forgotten and dirty clothes littering the floor. You woke at 6:55 am, just your luck. Your alarm doesn't go off until 7:00 am and normally this wouldn't affect anyone but it affects you, your kind of a perfectionist.

Groggily managing to sit up, hunched back, you started staring off into the pasty wall waiting for your alarm to buzz you more alert for the day, this reminded you that this was unlikely because you have math today. This wasn't good of you to decide to think about this since you loathed math and everything about it, even the professor teaching or rather telling you about it and how you 'need to know and revise this for your inevitable future!' put you off the subject and even properly looking at the old man in corduroy, seems like over thinking has now become a hobby- or rather a flaw of yours as you take a swift glance at your phone and realize it's getting to 7:15 am.

'Orderly morning routines are vital into an early and bright start to the day!' your mother used to scream in your ear as she ripped open the blinds and continued to do so for at least 3 years until her death back in 2010, you never really got along with your mother, if you wasn't sat in silence you were arguing about simple things, your voices going more in depth and carried away leading to shouting that neither of you realized what you were saying and at what volume 'stay out of it!' shed scream even though it had all the more to do with you than it did with her, it would decide the fate of your so called 'destiny' in whether you would stay in university and pay rent on a student flat or quit and live near the local church, knowing you and your tendency to switch from a believer to an atheist within a day wasn't a very good idea so you went with the better option even though it meant more work, she had good intentions your mother, but you never realized that of course 'only know what you've got till it's gone' that sentence rang in your ears as you only saw her mornings as her way of saying 'get out of bed you pathetic little sh-' your alarm buzzed managing to snap you out of you train of thought and back to reality.

You quickly proceeded to stand in your black and grey boxers that you wore yesterday, and the day before, scurry around the room hunting for clean shirts and pants but the only thing you could find was a grey pair of worn out skinny's and a t-shirt with a tattoo design on the front, it didn't really match your appearance in size and shape but you enjoyed the style of art and even though you were too afraid to ever have one actually done you always felt at ease seeing someone with one, knowing that they went through pain to show the world who they really are.

You ran into the small corridor that branched off toward the bathroom on your right and closet and spare bedroom on your left, you're faced with the arched opening of your living room and at the angle that you're standing in allows you to see the left-hand corner of the TV and some filled CD racks full of rock music and couple piles of books, you've forgotten about most of these, probably old revision books but with the way the chip packets formed around, you had no time to discover. You headed right into the bathroom and stared at yourself looking lost into the reflection in the mirror soon realizing that your first intention was to scrape some kind of brush through your nest of honey brown hair so it at least looked like you tried, you put your color contacts in, you have heterochromia, you have one brown eye and one blue, you don't see it as much of a big deal personally but people tend to point it out and your kind of sick of it. And with one last glance you shoved yourself into the 'kitchen' and grabbed whatever source of food you could find, money wasn't exactly coming in so you had to scrounge off microwave meals; even ordering take-outs was too much. You had one carton of apple juice, so you just left without breakfast like you do every morning.

Backpack slung onto weak shoulders, black slip-on vans barley protecting your feet from the cold, you don't have time to find the other shoe and so you just slip on anything, this happens to be just a different pair of slip-on vans but white, oh well. a heavy feeling is lingering down on you causing your head to droop down to stare at the floor whilst you turned for the elevator in the middle of the long hall, being here for about a year you have managed to successfully memorize the route of the long halls, busy roads and what to carefully avoid on the way, this was a seemingly normal morning for you. Surprisingly, no one was around because all the students who lived in the same block as you had class on a different day, this was because of you, it was totally and completely your fault for not thinking carefully about what block you should choose, you just went for the cheapest one and it turned out to be completely in the wrong place and all the other students in your class lived in the block opposite, it was a bit inconvenient but nevertheless you still turned up to classes remotely on time.

"Haven't seen you in a while"


	2. Chapter 2

You startle, snapping you head up, you're faced with a blonde kid, and he's round your age maybe a year younger. You usually saw each other around the building; you didn't know each other but you occasionally chit-chatted since he was close with your friend's girlfriend.

"No thit"

Ah your lisp, its old news to people who wanted to be pricks about it a year ago, no one really cares anymore and neither do you. "What the fuck happened?" You do not want to explain. You can't explain, you don't know how to.

"jutht the uthual, nothing big" He obviously gets the hint and just nods in response as you both walk down the empty halls towards the elevator. You press the button and stand with him waiting; all you can here is faint rap music from his headphones dangling on his neck. The elevator arrives and you step in with him following, him going to the 2nd floor and you to the ground floor leading to the quad. Neither of you say anything.

* * *

"Are you ok? Did you even fucking eat without my damn supervision or did you disembowel a pigeon from your window and feast on that?"

Karkat's colorful insults are always endearing, this guy is not surprisingly your best friend, he has been since you were kids, he's been slowly prying himself away from your clasps as your only close friend and has gained some other's. You are currently sitting at a table in the local café that your little group meet at. There are a few new faces your sure will be introduced. As soon as everyone shuts up and stops asking you questions.

"Dithembowelled pigeon is anything better then what you could cook up" You continued to sulk at the table, dignity washed beneath, but your snarky remarks remain.

"Personally I always thought you two were lovely together and I do not know what brought about this whole bre-" Karkat practically threw his hands over your other friend, Kanaya's mouth, smearing some of her deep red lipstick onto his hand.

"shhhhhh do you want to make him feel worse?!" escaped his mouth through gritted teeth, this remark was supposed to be something like a whisper but everyone in the café heard and turned their heads for a brief moment. You sighed and looked up at them.

"kk I really don't care, you can all ramble on ath much ath you want, me and Aradia are over, especially after the way I acted" This led a few to fall silent from idle chit-chatter and Karkat to fill with guilt.

"Look I really am sorry for you but this isn't the first fucking time it's gonna happen and it isn't the last so don't start weeping under the table and dribbling out how you miss her" Kanaya just nodded and someone who you don't know chimed in.

"I know you don't know me but from what I can see, sulking about it isn't going to get you anywhere, just be big and move on!" He has the best buck toothed smile you've seen, his black hair messy and glasses nearly as thick.

"And your name ith?" He seems embarrassed and looks to the side slightly.

"OH MY GOSH IM SO SORRY" A short girl with short blonde hair hidden by a blue cat hat with complete face and ears perked up and squealed at the top of her lungs. She isn't a proper friend of yours yet but she seems interested enough in Karkat.

"I was so distracted my mind slipped! Ok sooooo" deep breath in "this is john!" She pointed towards the guy with the buck teeth. He smiled awkwardly at you. "He's friends with Dave who couldn't make it here today, hmmmmm" she seems intense when looking around the table; you just lifted an eyebrow and watched. Dave is supposedly the name of the guy you get the elevator with almost every day, you'll be seeing more of him then. "This is Tavros who is just PAWESOME at Pokémon, like we played the other day and my Skitty couldn't stand his Tauros!" you're kind of tuning out. Tavros seems really kind but he looks like he's uncomfortable being here. "And this is Gamzee! He's a bit purrculiar but I'm sure you'll hit it off just fine, he's Karkitty's new roomie!"

You looked over to Karkat, eyebrows lifted.

"I'm only hearing about thith now?"

"you've been gone for weeks, if I knew you were alive, I would have fucking introduced you"

"you've known me for how many yearth, and you didn't check up on me to at leatht tell me thomeone elthe hath fallen into your death trap of a room?"

"hey if I fucking knew you still cared maybe I would have"

"BOYS that's enough bickering, we all know Sollux has been through a lot recently and it would help if we all didn't attack him at once, if we all calmed down a bit, including you Nepeta, we couldn't get to know our new-comers, as it were"

you have to agree with Kanaya's judgement and try to calm down. What the hell is Karkat's problem?! I know you were a bit distant when you and...Her were together and you did miss 2 weeks off to try to pull yourself together and then Sunday just wrecked everything when she came back to apologise and you just couldn't take it. But now he's just being an asshole, like he doesn't even care. But then again no one's knows about Sunday night yet, you'll tell him later.

Everyone started talking about what's been going on in the weeks you've been away to catch you up, you chatted with Gamzee and decided that, from the bits you could make sense of, that he's alright, apart from the obvious drug use he seems decent. John seems to be talking with Karkat cheerily while Karkat tried to seem interested, Nepeta and Kanaya are in some kind of conversation about twilight where you have to cringe at, how they're friends you will never know.

"I am so sorry I'm late guys! I was so swept up in swim class I nearly missed you all!" A bubbly girl, blonde hair swaying down her back, pink headband sweeping It from her face showing her big brown eyes and slight freckles and perfect smile, lips tinted pink matching her headband. Outfit consisting of a pink dress showing off her bust straps wrapping round her neck and skirt flaring out, bouncing around with her movements.

"Hey Feferi! Sit here!" Nepeta patted a seat she just made by scooting as far into Tavros as possible. She moved past John and Karkat to sit with her, she looked up and beamed at you, her face shining with excitement. "who's this then, Neppers!" she continued to smile at you. "Oh that's Sollux! He's in a bit of a mood because him and his girlfriend broke up"

"I'm so sorry to hear that! Hey Sollux, anytime you wanna carp abuoyt anyfin you can call me!" she slipped you a number on a card across the table.

"That was fast, fuck, and here I thought you nerds were girl repellent"

"thut up kk jutht cuz thhe ithn't giving you her number too" she then proceeded to slip her card to everyone on the table, including Karkat as he smirked at you. You couldn't stop to glance at her when she was going on about her day to Nepeta, both making equally as bad puns as the other. What's wrong with you, you just broke up with your long term girlfriend and now you're eyeing up a new fish straight from the sea. You need to get a fucking life. Everyone exchanged numbers and you all agreed to continue meeting here every day. FF said she was going to bring her other friend along saying he was a bit much at first so be prepared, Kanaya saying she was going to bring her girlfriend along too and John saying that Dave will be joining us tomorrow. You couldn't wait.

* * *

**AN: Thank you all so much for following, it means a lot. If you continue reading that would be great too. Will hopefully be updating chapters every Sunday. If there are mistakes please let me know and reviews are always welcome. Sleep tight friends.**


	3. Chapter 3

"Ow fuck!" great karkat just thought it was a good idea to slam a book into the back of your head. "You're not listening to me! Did you even fucking hear me?!"

"Who couldn't?"

SLAM.

"ANYWAY as I was saying before a lisping douche interrupted me...this girl with weird glasses has started an interest in me for some reason god knows why but you think you know her? red pointed glasses, into dragons?" hm this is odd, Karkat's a great guy you've been friends for years but suddenly girls are interested in him, wow guy must have levelled up a notch. "I doubt it, you thould athk the group later"

"oh yeah that thing almost forgot" blatant lie, you can see he's been worried about meeting everyone all day, you can't blame him you're a bit anxious to seeing Feferi again and that guy she's bringing, Kanaya's girlfriend and Dave, lot of people and you're not so used to being the social one. "thure kk" you grin at him showing a bit of teeth, you have crooked teeth, there not so bad people squint at you when you smile but there bad enough to tell you should have had braces as a kid. You continue walking down the street, your heading to the library so Karkat can return his book that's overdue and you tagging along so you don't turn into a vegetable and sit in you room all day. Again.

You look down at your shoes and note at how scruffy they are being there age and you only realize you're in the library when the librarian asks the both of you if you need any help. "No thanks" you look up, a smirk plastered on your face, you look at Karkat. "Oh shut up I'm a nice person to people who aren't pretentious pricks" karkat scowls back, face heating up as a few heads turn your way.

It takes him a while but he puts the book back and begins to dig out others to skim read, you're easily bored and begin scrounging the shelves seeing what's here, the last time you went in library was so long ago you've forgotten how these things work. Oh look a Steven King section, your slim fingers go to take one of the books but you leave it and begin wondering past. You're deep into the fantasy section now looking at the covers of the books when in the corner of your eye, is that? No it's just a typical hipster trying to be 'cool' looking at the harry potter books, what a dick. He sees you but continues to seem interested in the book, the only words that spring to mind is gay hipster. "You just gonna stare at me all day or w-what?"

"huh?" you snap out of it and look at the person in front of you, it's that gay hipster dude. "I know-w I'm pretty but you w-wanna stop starin' at me? Im tryin' ta read here"

"what? Are you britith?"

"yeah recently mov-ved"

"what'th with the thutter?"

"w-whats w-with the lisp?" You both glare at each other, eyes locked and narrowed. "what'th your name?"

"Eridan Ampora, yours?"

"Thollux Captor"

"w-well then, thollux" he grins at you knowing full well his insult "see you around" you just stand there not believing what just happened, who the hell was that?! You better find karkat and leave, you don't like books anyway.

* * *

"Yeah he wath jutht thtanding there, never theen him before"

"Huh that's odd, you think you'll see him again?"

"Probably not" he did say 'see you around' but you doubt you'll be seeing him again and no good will come if you do. You and karkat are slowly heading back to Karkat's flat, you didn't really get to meet Gamzee properly last time so you guess now is as good as any. You pull out your phone and briefly look at Feferi's contact information; you hadn't called her because you found it strange for her to give you her number in the first place, girls are strange creatures. You step inside and wow what is that smell, you look around at the dump, it's as bad as yours, maybe worse, chip packets everywhere stains on the carpet, blinds drawn to keep the light out, Gamzee's just sitting there staring at the loading screen for the Xbox. "Welcome to my castle of shit" karkat explains standing a little bit in front of you, arms wide welcoming you into his own hell. "Fuck you really let this place go huh"

"Shut the fuck up its better than your place" you walk in further looking over to Gamzee and back at Karkat "don't we have to leave thoon to go to the group thing?"

"Oh shit yeah, is it that time already? Fuck fuck ok let me just grab some cash and lets go"

* * *

**AN: so sorry for not updating last week i was at comic-con on sunday and i just never got around to doing it, chapter's shorter than usual please forgive me im a terrible person. Better description of Karkat's flat another review, favorite an all that awesome stuff, sleep tight friends.**


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